Little Green Men Festival

My dad is a nerd, so I come by this honestly. When he told me about an alien festival 10 minutes away from my grandmother (who we have been visiting) we HAD to go!

Ling story short, apparently 60 years ago in Kelly, KY some aliens landed and some rednecks fired at them. The community in Kelly is using this event as a way to raise money for a community center. It's a good fundraiser and an adorable event.

Despite having a bad episode earlier in the day, we drove up to Kelly, KY. I was really looking forward to it! We got there for opening ceremonies. We ate waaaaaayyyy too much. Funnel cake, fried pickles, and the best smoked ham sandwich I've ever eaten. Southerners know how to eat!

We did all the silly photo ops. 

My dad found a friend from work:

I chilled with the daughter of the people who had dealings with the aliens. She was a sweet lady. I got her book and a little stuffed alien, both signed by her.

My little brother lasted a long time in the mechanical bull.

And, because I'm trying to get myself to do stuff I'd normally do, that I can do, that will yield me positive reinforcement for my health, I sang in front of the small town crowd. It was a gospel open mike. All I know are Catholic Church songs so I sang "Here I Am, Lord" I felt head tremors during the chorus, so I stopped, but I got a verse and a chorus out. It wasn't that I was performing in front of people. I've performed so much in front of people in the past it doesn't phase me. It's the getting over my own perfectionism for positive results, and a since of pride. And I did it! I was flat, I got winded, I couldn't annunciate, and I tremors bad, but I did it! My crippled ass did it! I'm proud of myself. 

Now as I lay here in bed with my alien stuffed animal, convulsing with a headache. I can say I went for it. I did it, and I even got some applause! *fist pump*

I feel like a badass!

Gush

So it's been a while...

I had a week of seizures followed by my mom and brother visiting. 

So I'm going to take a moment to gush over my boyfriend a bit. Not only does he help me survive my conversion disorder, pushes me to try hard in everything I do, and play with me (flirting, gaming, larping, imaginary business...you name it he plays with me)

This week he made me melt so much. He cleaned the house, he took Noah to see a movie, he taught him to build stuff in the workshop, he took me to drop off the new kitten at the vets, he prayed with us even though he didn't know the words. He held me when I needed it when I was interrupting the two hours of sleep in 48 hours...

And he made me this sweet fucking asymmetrical ring out of plywood 

OUT OF FUCKING PLYWOOD!!! I look so amazingly posh!!

My boyfriend is so talented and amazing and wonderful! I am so glad I found someone so supportive and loving!

And because of my amazing parents I have contacts and glasses and prescription sunglasses!

This has been an amazing week, and it only gets better, granny tomorrow!!!!

Have I mentioned the new kitten!?!?!

Post seizure lament

Never ever ever ask someone who just had a seizure to do anything. The brain is not an okay place to be at that point. And if it was a grand maul, chances are it feels like they were beaten with a rubber hose... It's not the "oh my muscles hurt after exercising" type of pain. It hurt to breathe moving from stomach to back makes you see a flash of white and then you hear someone whimper before the pain hits and you realize it was you.

At least that's my experience with non epileptic seizures. I can't imagine the epileptic kind are any more pleasant. I'm just saying. And for the love of God, if they can swallow get them a gorram water! They just did a hardcore mental and aerobic workout.

So I learned more about my limits today. Reading still can set me off. Social gatherings can still set me off. Too much of a good thing can set me off. So the party rages on without me. I lay on my comfortable couch with the supplies my boyfriend joe got me sipping my cool refreshing water while the crickets sing and the cats chirp at each other.

It's not that bad though. Yes, I'm sore and the world feels blurry and like I'm not here. Like I'm watching a blurry daytime soap opera about a person who's supposed the be me, but I'm not her.. But I got to eat shitty nacho cheese on hot dogs. I got to play in kiddy pools. I got to meet a guy from South Africa. I got to chill with amazing people and see my boy have a good time. So it's not a total bist.

School is going to happen!

Alright! I'm taking a lesson from the oldest of trees. If you can't bend, you break. So my school plans have gone up in a cloud of stress, confusion, and bending over backwards to try to get the classes I need to finish. I can't do it. Starting sometime between now and January 1st I will start classes at WGU. It's an online school so I can take all my classes on the Internet. I will get my masters degree. I will have my teaching license. Come hell or high water!

I'm also decorating the house. The paint used in this rental reminds me of the short story of the yellow wallpaper, but green and stained and in desperate need of a patch up. There's little natural light upstairs either. Spending all my time here is driving me crazy, hence the decorating.

I'm going to hang some colorful pictures, a lot of mirrors, and then make some pretty garland of paint swatches and some old gold craft paper I have laying around for the reflectiveness. I also am working on a colorful rug and blanket. It will be eclectic, which won't please joe, but it's what I can afford so that's how it's going to be till I have a bigger that exceeds 10 bucks a month.

Pictures of progress:

Bitch to boss

I've been a needy whiney cunt lately. I lay in bed and mope about life. I say I'm done with that. Joe really snapped me out of it when he said it was bothering him how infrequently I shower...aaaaannnnddddd I'm determined to prove I'm not a dirty smelly neck beard. 

Today I

Watched the sun rise

Discovered how awesome Instagram is.

Showered

Got paperwork done

Went shopping

Walked 2 miles

Signed up for volunteering at the adult literacy center.

Did more shopping. Poked my new kitten in the balls to make fun of him that he's loosing them soon.

Fed me

Fed the cats

Fed my noodle Balsa

Started another art project

Did some yoga

Orgainization my parents visit and my trip to granny's

Got a new editor for my larp.

Now I'm going to sleep

I'm exhausted so I'm off to sleep!