The mysterious accent and other social adaptations

When I go out, on rare occasions, and I can actually talk, I find I have a few amusing things that happen.

The first is people ask me where my mysterious accent is from. It normally ends up awkward for them as I tell them it's from my brain. At my best, I can't pronounce r, sh, th, g, j, n, and a couple other letters and diphthongs. Most of these are replaced with a z sound if I replace them at all. Joe asked me to say "rugby" a while ago. We both got a kick out of it. 

Which brings me to my next point. I think it's become easier to tell people I have brain damage than conversion disorder. People understand brain damage. I have to explain and explain conversion disorder. I get out so rarely I don't want my time in public to revolve around explanations.

Andrea has got me seriously thinking about a medical service dog. I can't take care of one right now, but it would make me less dependent on Joe. A dog could bring my medicines if I have a seizure, and curl up with me after getting someone to help. He could nudge or lick me when I'm getting ready to have an attack, and make me calm down with distractions and cute. He can guide me to a safe place if I get really bad and minimize the symptoms just like Joe does. Again, I'm not ready for another animal yet, but it's a nice thought.

Less than epic garden

Since I can't really have a garden like I did last year. As much as I'd like to, I need plants that essentially take care of themselves. With excellent donations from my mother and my home girl, Katie, I now have a pleasant little congress of houseplant which I adore! (Although I'm thinking of getting one or two more, maybe a cat grass bin for Willow or an indoor tree.

My kitchen plants! One of them is a bunch of green onions that I've used and regrew from there.

These are my only outdoor plants. It's an Easter lily that Joe gave me, and my red lilies that I've had for years. I do absolutely no work with them, though one day I'll weed them for the sake of getting the crap plants out.

And micilanious plants that I still have to orgainize around the house.

I think I'm going to put this group of succulents upstairs.

Old Times Sake

I wanted to share another project I've slowly been working on:

Joe asked me to insulate the ac unit. The window was essentially open so I got some insulation board, cut it down and taped it to the window with masking tape. But that looked bad, so I covered that in fabric and now I'm pinning ribon to it to make it look nice.

I also went out with my friends today! It felt liberating to get out of the house! I mean, I've been all but a shut in since all this conversion disorder business started. So I was stolen! 

I had 2 beers, a few tater tots,and a cupcake! It was a red velvet cupcake. I always thought that red velvet was chocolate based, but this tasted like almonds. It was wonderful!

We also met an adorable dog! I forgot her name, but it was so relaxing to pet an adorable puppy for an hour. Cats are awesome and adorable, but after so long they're done with being pet and walk off. Dogs could content themselves to being pet forever!

It was a good day, but now I am exhausted. I'm hoping to clean bunches tomorrow. <3 dishes and maybe finish the ac unit. That's a lot for me, but I don't want to push too hard. 

Blue Apron

I've been having a hard time recently with shopping and cooking. I find I have the energy to do one and not the other. So I signed Joe and I up for Blue Apron. I loved it I didn't have to stress shopping because everything I needed except salt and pepper came in the box.

Tonight I cooked a healthy meal for us! I needed help mincing the garlic, I'm not good enough to do a lot of fancy knife work yet, and I'd like to keep my fingers.

It turned out amazing!

Joe rated it at a 7 out of 10 for flavor. I chose 8 of 10. It was tasty, but not the best. But the fact it's a ballanced meal that I didn't have to shop for makes the experiance a 10 out of 10!

Seriously, if I had to make this kind of meal and shop for it, I would be in seizure city! As it stands I'm just exhausted. I can't wait for the next meal!

Debate

Last night I had a debate with Joe. Now, most people think this isn't a big deal, but I'm not a confrontational person. Normally I'll state my opinions, and leave it at that.

Badasses don't back down from an intellectual debate, even if no ones mind is going to be changed by it. Knowing this, and knowing me, Joe didn't let me take the cheep way out.

We debated in the way that civilized people debate for 30-45 minutes! It would have been longer, but I was exhausted and needed sleep., and I let him know.

I feel proud that in my own little way, on my own terf, with people I trust I can let loose and feel free to voice my contrary opinions civilly and feel safe and confident.

I really admire my boyfriend for being supportive of me and reminding me to push myself in ways I can handle for my own sake and not his.

Score one more for team badass!

Make a rug

So I'm making a rug...I'm having a bad day so I'm going to post a step by step for the stitch. I'm also posting the inspiration for it that I found on Pinterest.

Just keep swimming...

The I haven't posted much lately. What time I'm not dealing with business I spend zoned out and doing things that come automatically. Its been emotional on many levels I'd care not to share. It's a bit much to handle, but I've been making progress.

My tremors are manageable and I haven't had a seizure in a while. I'm still exhausted most of the time, and sometimes my tremors get go bad I can't function. However, most of the time, as long as I don't leave my house, I am almost where I was this time last year: minor tremors and overwhelming exhaustion.

I started making a rug for the guest room. I don't get a lot of work done everyday because my joints start hurting. But it's turning out well.

I'm crocheting some soft yarn around some old tee shirt yarn. It's about 10 inches so far. I plan on alternating blue and yellow in 12inch and 4inch segments. I'm hoping to get it to 6 to 8 feet in diameter. Eventually I plan on getting the guest room set up in a blue and yellow celestial theme. I'll be making wall artwork, and making a bed sheet set. If I ever have spawn this will become their room.

Speaking of spawn, since I have so much time on my hands, I plan on making a spawn hope chest type thing, making cloth diapers, clothes, toys and other baby things. One day when I poop one out I'll have to spend less money and time so I can enjoy it. 

Joe taught me how to snake a drain today:

Learning to be self sufficient is badass. Here are the tools of the trade:

Well, one of them we couldn't figure out what it was for. So I used it to help Joe:

I learned a lot. Mostly why I don't like plumbing. The sound of metal on metal and the gunk...mostly the the sound of metal on metal. 

I've also been cooking a bit. I made egg rolls for the first time. Never again, however. They turned out amazing and addicting and tasty, but they took forever and drained me horribly.

Hopefully I'll be writing more in the future.