Now I panic.

I can't stop thinking about what I'm going to do if I loose my disability. I might not have lost it which is good news. but seriously, I can't afford to live without disability. I know this because I am not getting subbing calls. I can't work full time if full time isn't presented to me. That means I'll need a second job, and the only other jobs I'm qualified for are minimum wage jobs, which I also can't live on.

What I need to do is problem solve.

What I'm actually doing is laundry and dishes because they are less threatening.

On a positive note, I got a lot of laundry done today. I also went to the gym and didn't fall asleep on the treadmill. So, progress?

Tomorrow I have to call the DMV about weather they got my seizure update packet. If I didn't fill it out correctly I might loose my license. So I'm worried about that.

I wish I had never gotten sick. I wish I wasn't sick. I wish this past 2 years was a nightmare. I'll wake up and I'll be back in school and on my way to becoming a teacher. I'd have energy and not have to worry about seizures ever. I'd not have to worry about weather I can drive or not. I'd be thinner and beautiful. I really miss my old life.

Also, How do you spell the word "weather" as in "I love you WEATHER or not you love me." It's pissing me off that I don't know it.